The Clouds Are Grey Today

Lol, I feel really happy right now.  On Friday I had both my Chem and Math midterms.

I didn’t sleep at all.

My night consisted of doing Chem practice problems and watching Professor Toupadakis talk.  As enjoyable as it was, I was really tired.

I studied mainly for Chem because my Chem midterm was at 8:00am.  I tried to memorize some of the Calculus definitions and theorems but I was scared it was going to mix me up because I might forget the Chem stuff.

But yeah, I felt sort of confident when I took the Chem midterm.  It feels so good to actually know what you’re doing on the test and to actually find your calculations in the answer choices!  Lol, but yeah a couple of hours later I found out I got an 89/100!  Yeah, they grade very quickly and SO much better than last midterm.  Oh and the class average was 57, so I’m pretty sure I got an A.  Lol, and I got in the top 20 scores!

Okay, for my Math midterm, I wasn’t as confident because I didn’t have all night to study for it.  And the midterm was at 4:10pm.  I wasted so much time trying to memorize all the definitions!  I think I have OCD.  I’m an ALL or NOTHING kind of person.  So either I memorize it word for word, or I won’t remember it at all.  Gosh, there were so many terms, lol, seriously waste of my time, I should have been trying the math problems instead.

And when I was doing my Math midterm, I didn’t know how to do some of the problems.  It made me nervous because although on the last midterm, I didn’t remember completely how to do some of the problems, I was able to do SOMETHING, but on this midterm I guessed on some of the problems and even left a problem BLANK.

That’s already 8 points down the drain.  Darn differentials … I memorized the equation dy=f’(x)dx, but the problem gave me 2 numbers and told me to approximate.  Lol, I had no clue as to what to do!  Also 1 of the definitions was to get the differential of a function f at a point x knot.  Lol, okay I memorized the definition (sort of) … Let f(x) be a function … dx is an independent variable … dy=f’(x)dx … but I was so confused when they asked for the differential at x knot.  What?!?!  I don’t recall this in the book, but I wrote down the STUPIDEST thing possible … I put down the definition for a derivative.

WHAT THE HELL?!?  Lol, well that’s 4 more points down the drain.  Studying for the terms was stupid.  Lol, out of the 3 definitions, I only got 1 right.  What a serious waste of time.  I got 5/12 points for the definitions.

Also on Question 2, they tell you to answer 4 out of 5 parts.  Part a asked you to state the chain rule.  Omg, lol, I couldn’t remember it.  Lol, I was able to prove it but I couldn’t state the formal definition.

Okay, 92, 89, 88, 86, … , 10, 9, 8, 7,7 … the mean was 51.5 and the median was 53.

Therefore, A=80, B=70, C=40, D=30.  I already knew that I had 16 points off.

Me: Wow, why did people get such high scores this time?
Seth: No, they’re about the same as last time.
Me: Do you have the average from last time?  Well it’s 10 points higher, that’s a big difference.
Seth: Don’t worry, you probably got a 92.
Me: No, I definitely got 16 points off.

A couple of minutes later.

Me: Did he say K through L?
Seth: I think he said K through M.
Me: Oh …
Seth: Um, that’s still you … L … K through M.
Me: … Oh yeah!

(Jenny runs down, finds her test and runs back up!)

Me: Omg!
Seth: You got a 92.
Me: No, what is this?!?!
Seth: That’s an 82.
Me: Omg!

(Seth … FACEPALM!)

1 point more than the last midterm.  That’s IMPROVEMENT, and that’s all that matters … lol, according to Professor Milton.

Currently Listening to: Jay Chou – Dragon Rider

I feel blah … lol, I don’t know. I don’t think I feel either happy or sad. I have my Chem and Math midterms on Friday. I feel like I should be more worried because I haven’t done much studying but yeah …

Haha, this post is really vague, pointless and stupid. I think I’m just procrastinating more. I have to meet with my ASA group tomorrow to go over our presentation in discussion.

[Sigh] I don’t like presentations. I’m not good at public speaking; I know a lot of people aren’t either but it really stresses me out to talk in front of people. I don’t like being put in the spotlight and I don’t like having people stare at me. I don’t mind explaining something to a small group of people but when I have to stand up in front of the class, it really freaks me out.

Two years ago, in Media Academy, my group had to present our commercial, website and research on Republican candidate for the governor of California, Arnold Schwarzenegger. I memorized my part word for word without a sweat but when I had to say it front of the audience, my mind blanked out and I was struggling to get all the words out. My group members were staring at me (I think some of them were nervous for me) and I couldn’t focus. I really thought I was going to faint at the time.

Gosh, I miss Media Academy! One of my biggest topics to blog about on my Xanga was Media Academy. Haha, never thought I’d say this, but I miss LOGGING AND CAPTURING! I miss my teachers too, especially Ms. Thurston and Mr. Temple. I’ll probably never see them again. They’re too busy anyway.

I thought my life was finally turning around my Senior year of high school. I had something I was good at, something to look forward to. I was getting along with my friends and I got into Davis (my 1st choice). [Sigh] But I’m still as confused as ever! I don’t know what I’m going to do with my life.

I seriously feel that I have all the time in the world to sort things out. Like right now, I should be studying but I feel there’s enough time to blog. Lol, I can’t wait till Spring Break! I’m going to lie in bed and sort out all my thoughts.

“I have too long digressed, and therefore shall return to my subject.”

Oh yeah, I found out on Monday that my lab partner, Ray, dropped out of Chem. You do what you’ve got to do. I shouldn’t say I feel happy about him dropping, but it does make lab easier for me. It was frustrating for me to work with him, but I admit, he was really helpful with the last lab we did together.

Wahhhh, back to studying for Chem and Math. Most likely, just Chem tonight. I can’t wait till this week ends! But then I still have my ASA presentation to do on Tuesday. Life is sucky and depressing.

Currently Listening to: JJ Lin Jun Jie – High Fashion